He stands at the door and knocks.

In the Holy Bible, in the book of Malachi, we read:

7 Even from the days of your fathers ye are gone away from mine ordinances, and have not kept them. Return unto me, and I will return unto you, saith the Lord of hosts. (Malachi 3:7)

This verse indicates that as the people of that day “even from the days of [their] fathers” were “gone away from [God's] ordinances.” They had moved away.

I have never read of, nor experienced, where God has made the first move away. I have heard of and experienced Him being slower to respond to us when we have been slow to remember Him.

I have also experienced Him leaving me alone to learn and experience things on my own.

In thinking of these times, I am reminded of my children as they were learning to walk and the way my wife or I would watchfully hover, letting them experiment, cruise around the furniture, and even fall so that they could safely learn.

God has given us the independence to choose Him, or not choose Him. We are independent beings who act as agents responsible for our own actions. I believe it is out of His great love for us and His desire for our growth and progress that He has granted us this independence and freedom, so that we can learn for ourselves important lessons. How sad it is, I think, when we take our God-given independence as a sign that He doesn’t care or is somehow not interested in us and our well-being.

I love this and other scriptures that teach us otherwise:

“Draw near unto me, and I will draw near unto you.” (Doctrine and Covenants 88:63)

I am sure the Lord is not mistaken, here. As we seek, we are promised we will find. As we knock, we are promised He will open unto us.

The key thing seems to be our faith, will, and choice being turned toward Him… first.

My experience is that our Father in Heaven is always available to us, His children, and that when we withdraw from Him, it usually reflects a weakening of OUR faith, which causes a distance between us and His power–between us and His love.

He is bound to honor our independence, but he is not bound to give us everything we ask for. In other words, He will not force us against our will. He will, and does, respond to our righteous desires in so far as they align with His will, or what He knows is best for us.

Some turn away from Him when He fails to bend to their desires, or when He doesn’t intervene and it results in harm to others. Admittedly, there was a time when it puzzled me to think of an all-powerful being having to honor constraints such as our independent will (or the law of agency), but He is very careful never to violate the agency of His children. It seems apparent that our growth, learning, and experience are a higher priority to Him than our convenience, comfort, and even our happiness–if inconvenience, discomfort, and some reality therapy can help us learn to be more giving, kind, grateful, humble, teachable, and selfless.

Whenever He seems distant from me, it is because of my position relative to His standards. It is because I have wandered away, not because He has moved. I also see the unhappiness of some who have distanced themselves from Father through the choices they have made, and then feel angry at Him for His not remaining near to them. “If God really loved me, He would not judge me. He would be near me.” The truth is, I believe, that He is still, and ever, there, just as available as ever. Their conscience, the light of Christ given to every man, woman, and child, feels distant and unworthy from His standards, so they sense that He has moved away.

It is a little like the old, pre-modern science that asserted that the sun, planets, and stars move around the earth, held in their place by giant plates, or wires.

We move. Father’s path and ways are consistent. How arrogant of us to think that we push God away, or pull Him near through our will and actions. We distance ourselves through our choices.

So, how does one return unto Him? How does one draw near to Him that He might draw near to them?

For me, the most intimate of the ways we have access to Him is through prayer. Whenever I close off life’s distractions, put away my selfish independence, push past fears, bring myself down beneath my baseless pride, and open up my sincerest desires to Him, with real intent to receive and respond to His help, He is there.

Even in the most challenging of circumstances, prayer brings me feelings of gratitude for all that I do have and for the troubles I don’t have–that things aren’t worse! I feel an increased awareness of the pain and suffering of others less fortunate than me. In the bitterness of whatever I am experiencing, a sweet calm comes.

Annette, my wife, likes to say that “Sometimes the Lord calms the storm, and sometimes he calms the sailor.” So true! When we need Him, He is there. Note that I didn’t say “When we need Him, He will be there. The truth, I believe, is that He IS always there. At the risk of sounding Clintonian, the other difference between “is” and “will be” is that we don’t just need Him in the future, and He isn’t just interested in some future, weighty need, we need Him, and He is ready to help and bless us, now.

It is very important to me to point out that I am not delusional as regards the readership of this blog; it will be read by my family, a few friends, and an occasional stranger who happens by.  I write to that stranger. I also dedicate this post, once again, to my children.

My motive for writing go beyond any hopes that what I share here might persuade, convert, or defend beliefs–my hope is simply to acknowledge that through my personal life experiences I have seen enough of what to my mind and thinking is abundant evidence that…

1. There is a supreme being.
2. He is our Heavenly Father.
3. We are His children.
4. He loves us.

What do I mean by “there is a supreme being?”

I mean that I am confident that all things do not exist by mere chance. We exist. We existed even before our conception and birth in the form of our spirit. To me, one of the greatest evidences of this occurs at death, when our body is no longer capable of housing our spirit. Our spirit separates from our body and it dies. But our spirit lives on.

When my wife, Kristin, died, twenty years ago, I had the great honor and remarkable experience of being with her as she passed. The details of that experience are too personal to relate in its forum, but I believe it was clear to me at that moment that she, meaning the person and character and feeling of her, was no longer in the same location as her dead body.  Yet, I can tell you that I felt her near, but not there. In the weeks and months that followed her death–and occasionally since–I experience that same sense of her spirit being near and, well…, not dead.

Further “evidence” has been at the births of each of my ten children.  Gratefully, I have been able to attend to both Kris, and Annette as they have given birth to our children.  In each case, there is a sense of sacredness and transfer as each precious new life began independent existence on earth with a first breath. (Other awesome experiences of having children respond within the womb to music and other stimulus have convinced me that life begins before that point.)

Third, in the Mormon faith, we learn of God’s great plan of happiness, or the plan of salvation that Father in Heaven put in place for us, His Children.  These essential truths are reviewed on the Church’s websites: LDS.org – Our Eternal Life (for which I am the current director) and Mormon.org – God’s Plan of Happiness.  I won’t reiterate these teachings here, but I do want to say that when I review them, I simply feel that the teachings are true.

This “feeling” is important. I think that it is reasonable that I should try to describe it. I experience this feeling as I encounter important teachings as a reassuring familiarity and quiet peace about them that give me a convicti0n that they are true.

First, here is what my sense of truth is NOT:

• This sense is not merely an emotional response to the teachings.  While I feel happiness and reverence, this sense of confidence is extrinsic and transcendent of those good feelings.
• It is also not just psychological satisfaction with the concepts being taught. While I have a sense of clarity, this sense of illumination is not just going on in my psyche. It is something I do not generate. It comes variously as I pursue understanding that is of a spiritual nature.
• It is also not the buzz of intellectual alignment or cerebral titillation that I feel and relish when my mind is exercised in coming to understand math, science, or deep philosophical notions.  While I have felt that while contemplating these truths, the sureness of this knowledge is more like what I feel when I have seen something happen, and I am sure of my perspective and my version of “what just happened.”  It is not theoretical to me, but very real.
• It is also not a physical sensation like the chills I feel when I hear great music. It is not like what I feel as adrenaline causes my heart to race and my reparation to change in response to some change in conditions.

It IS:

• A sense of confidence in what I am learning.
• A satisfaction that the concepts are good.
• A comfort and contentedness combined with a clarity of thought.
• A quiet witness, even a whisper–not heard, but felt–that says, “it’s true.”

What do I mean by “He is our Heavenly Father?”

It is my belief that these feelings come as a gift from our loving Heavenly Father to help us discern truth from error and find our way forward in our lives.

I believe He communicates to us in this quiet, subtle way for our benefit, learning, and independent growth.

I believe He sees our independence and ability to choose as something He will not violate. Only as we seek truth does His Holy Spirit give us clarity of thought along with a gentle witness to our hearts that things are true.

I have come to trust and rely upon this gentle sense of rightness in my mind and my heart as a test of truth as I have been willing to put aside my intellectual and emotional thoughts and feelings and open myself up to the truth–whatever it might be.

How are we “His children?”

When Christ prayed, the New Testament records, He addressed His Father in Heaven as “Our Father who art in Heaven.”  Why the plural possessive?  I believe His Father in Heaven IS as He said, He is “Our Father in Heaven,” the father of us all.  Clearly, this is not a physical fatherhood.  Then what kind of fatherhood is it?  It is a spiritual fatherhood. He, the physical father of Jesus Christ is also Christ’s spiritual father–or the father of Christ’s spirit–and ours.

We lived before we came to this earth. Where did we live?  In the presence of our Father in Heaven.  There, I believe, we wanted to be like Him, so he prepared a plan that we might live on earth and accomplish that great goal.

Central to that plan was that He would provide a way back to His presence through repentance, which would require the sacrifice of one who could pay the price–suffer and die–for the mistakes we would make while isolated from Him. Our choices would lead us back as we choose to follow the teachings of prophets who speak and record message from Him to us.  By following Christ, we are able, through His grace, become forgiven of our sins and misdeeds. In this sense, Christ is also our Father. He raises us from our mistakes and inevitable spiritual death to life eternal with Him and our Father in Heaven.

How do I know that “He loves us?”

Much of what I believe in this regard is the byproduct of personal, spiritual experiences  far too personal and too sacred to write of here.  Still, I feel the moral obligation to tell you about the amazing love I felt from Him as I served as a missionary for two years telling the beautiful people of Taiwan about Him and His plan of happiness.  I saw many of their lives change as they came to feel His love and peace in their lives. I saw their capacity to love and serve others become fully realized as a result of the wholeness and joy they felt as they gained their own personal experiences.

I also felt His love surround me when I lost my wife to leukemia. Time and again, as I put the kids to bed and went about doing the work of laundry and cleaning through lonely hours, I would pray to Him for support, and I would feel an encouraging warmth come into my soul–a sacred unity or connection with a power much, much bigger than myself.

So why is THIS the most important thing I have learned?

This believe/knowledge is at the core of why I live–my purpose on earth.  I believe I am here to help others get more out of life and make their lives more meaningful.  Knowing that we are all His children provides me with the greatest desire possible to see others lifted up out of their physical or spiritual poverty to a happier life.  I believe that my ability to do this has been greatly, if not completely, reliant upon our Father in Heaven’s love.

• I am 52, and one for each year seemed appropriate.
• There are 52 weeks in a year, and I am going to write one post per week on each of the lessons throughout 2012.

Life’s Purpose

1. Heavenly Father loves His children
2. Every person is His child
3. Father is ever near—we move
4. God’s acceptance is enough (Honors of men are fleeting)
5. Death isn’t our end
6. Life wasn’t our beginning
7. Families can be together forever
8. People, not things, are important
9. Sweet’s found passing through bitter

Better Relationships

10. Legacies of love last longest
11. Forgiveness is charity’s highest act
12. Building trust is hard work
13. Trust is character and competence
14. Character is duty’s selfless performance
15. Competence is elegant, reliable performance
16. Assume good will
17. Who gets credited matters little
18. Others are never just objects
19. When in love, be yourself

Getting More Out of Life

20. More important than doing: causing
21. Time’s man-made, not inherently important
22. Manage energy, not time
23. When inspired, write it down
24. Steady progress beats flashy performance
25. Success has no real shortcuts
26. Process enables (doesn’t cause) accomplishment.
27. Effectiveness vs efficiency? Do BOTH!
28. Fight status quo, unless God-given
29. Work on, not in, problems
30. Listen, observe, ponder, act
31. There’s usually a better way
32. Contribution out-performs cooperation and competition

Getting Through Hard Times

33. Life is mostly about learning
34. Learning is mostly about failure
35. Willingness precedes all real growth
36. When provoked, hold your peace
37. Optimize for the current state
38. People are action motivated. Do!
39. People are motion activated. Go!

Winning Ways to (and not to) Be

40. Gratitude precedes all other virtues
41. Giving hope casts out fear
42. Act! Don’t be acted upon
43. Be easily pleased, never satisfied
44. Rumors repeated destroy trust
45. Negativity is a selfish cancer
46. Selfishness causes life’s worst pain
47. Develop Integrity: say and do
48. Expect miracles—act in faith
49. True confidence is self-trust, virtue
50. Don’t fear failure. It teaches
51. Fear begets fear, guarantees failure
52. Change, without willingness, is impossible (Change, with willingness, will occur)

As I read it, I felt grateful for the straight-forward manner in which the article spoke directly and clearly about the remarkable, sacred, and to some unbelievable events that occurred at or near that spot.

Formerly known as the town of Harmony, the site is in Oakland Township in Pennsylvania near the present-day town of Susquehanna. This site is important to Latter-day Saints as the location where Joseph Smith received the Aaronic Priesthood at the hands of John the Baptist and, in a nearby location, received the Melchizedek Priesthood from Peter, James and John in 1829. These men appeared as angels to restore to the earth the same authority they had received from Jesus Christ. The site is also significant as the place where Joseph Smith translated much of the Book of Mormon. These events laid the foundation for the restoration of the original Church established by Christ Himself.

I love this for three reasons:

The reader must confront the truths of the restoration as historic facts.
The sweet reminder that these events did, in fact, occur.
The fact that I can sit here, hands on keyboard, and know that I know it, not of myself, but because I have received a personal, deep, peaceful, spiritual witness that these miraculous, divine interventions in the course of human history took place and that the world is a better place for it. I feel so blessed to know that God still speaks to his children, gives them his trust in the form of his holy priesthood, and reaches out to us to let us know of his love as I feel it in receiving the personal witnesses of peace noted.

To be quiet about it is easier. To just say “I’m just like you, but I’m a Mormon!” (which I am, and that’s great) and hope there is no discomfort in the fact that I believe (and know by spiritual peace after study and prayer) angels did restore God’s priesthood authority to the earth ” in Oakland Township in Pennsylvania near the present-day town of Susquehanna.”

We all confront the question of truth and error every day. We adjust our daily choices according to what we believe we know. Today, I am grateful that this article has given me the chance to confront, and have reaffirmed, these great truths this beautiful spring morning.

Doing Research on the Internet – Cartoon by Chris Madden.  Great cartoon, Chris!

If you feel evil, keep it to yourselves until you overcome that evil principle. This is what I call resisting the devil, and he flees from me. I strive to not speak evil, to not feel evil, and if I do, to keep it to myself until it is gone from me, and not let it pass my lips.

… If there is nothing in the heart which governs us, and controls to an evil effect, the tongue of itself will never produce evil.

… When you are influenced by the Spirit of Satan, keep your thoughts to yourselves–keep your mouths closed; for speaking produces fruit, either of a good or evil character…

You frequently hear brethren and sisters say that they feel so tried and tempted, and have so many cares, and are so buffeted, that they must give vent to their feelings; and they yield to the temptation, and deal out their unpleasant sensations to their families and neighbors. Make up your minds thoroughly, once for all, that if we have trials, the Lord has suffered them to be brought upon us, and he will give us grace to bear them; and that they do not concern our families, friends, and neighbors, we can bear them off alone. But if we have light or intelligence—that which will do good, we will impart it; but our bad feelings, our desponding feelings, our dark hours, and disagreeable sensations we will keep to ourselves. Let that be the determination of every individual, for spirit begets spirit—likeness, likeness; feelings beget their likeness…

If, then, we give vent to all our bad feelings and disagreeable sensations, how quickly we beget the same in others, and load each other down with our troubles, and become sunk in darkness and despair!

And in all your social communications, or whatever your associations are, let all the dark, discontented, murmuring, unhappy, miserable feelings—all the evil fruit of the mind, fall from the tree in silence and unnoticed; and so let it perish, without taking it up to present to your neighbours. But when you have joy and happiness, light and intelligence, truth and virtue, offer that fruit abundantly to your neighbours, and it will do them good, and so strengthen the hands of your fellow-beings…

– Brigham Young, Journal of Discourses, 5:351=352

Wikisource

My first exposure to this teaching by Brigham Young was at the Nauvoo Pageant, where three of my teen-aged children and I participated as cast members for two weeks. The director of the pageant that year was Ray Robinson. I recall very clearly the day Ray and his staff shared this teaching with us and challenged us as a cast to not engage in negative complaining, or “fruiting” as they called it.

The rule was, basically, this:

Don’t engage in negative conversation with anyone who is not in a position to do something about it!

Pretty simple! The difference between “fruiting” and constructive conversation is huge–not particularly in substance but in audience and intentions. The thing I love about the rule is that it is really very simple–if the person you are expressing negativity to is not in a position to change or effect the thing you are down about, you are “fruiting.” If they are in a position to effect change, the conversation will undoubtedly take the essential turn toward, “therefore what? … What can/should we do to fix this?”

At any rate, the pageant experience was remarkably positive. Even though we were on the outdoor stage in the hot, humid sun from early in the morning through the afternoon, then performed and cleaned up that night, people stayed positive. We avoided fruiting and lifted one another up. When someone would complain, another cast member might grin and ask, “Did you just fruit?”

I believe that this is a manifestation of what some people call the Law of Attraction, which I find has some truth to it:

We attract into our lives that which we desire and that which we place our energy and efforts in.

When we are focused on the negative, we attract the negative, if only because we are not focused in our energies and efforts on that which will fix what’s bugging us, or on that which will benefit us.

I am so grateful to be reminded of this true principle of the fruits of our expressions. I need to check myself and really adhere to it. I am sure that as I do it will have a positive impact on me and others.

“If ingratitude be numbered among the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place among the noblest of virtues.”

Then, he shared:

“Gratitude is not only the greatest of all virtues, but the parent of all others.” — Cicero

Second, I find that when I am most stressed out or lonely or down on life or feeling selfish, what is missing most from my psyche is gratitude.  Gratitude to or for the source of my unhappiness, gratitude for things completely unrelated, but especially gratitude to God for the very opportunity to know enough of ease, or fulfillment of my hopes and dreams that I know of the gap between my current reality and the way I think things should be going.  Ironically, the very ability I have to sense that I want something or some situation better says that I have much to be thankful for.

And, when I finally give up my selfishness and acknowledge the abundance of my life and my blessings, my soul quiets, my spirit awakes, and a sweet, calm, light, chases away and replaces any darkness.

Third, A popular hymn reads:

“When upon life’s billows you are tempest tossed
When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost
Count your many blessings, name them one by one
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done

Count your blessings, name them one by one
Count your blessings, see what God hath done!
Count your blessings, name them one by one
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done

Are you ever burdened with a load of care?
Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
Count your many blessings, every doubt will fly
And you will keep singing as the days go by

When you look at others with their lands and gold
Think that Christ has promised you His wealth untold
Count your many blessings. Wealth can never buy
Your reward in heaven, nor your home on high

So, amid the conflict whether great or small
Do not be disheartened, God is over all
Count your many blessings, angels will attend
Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end

– Words public domain

Finally, I have been given so much in the way of opportunities, responsibilities, family, faith, freedom, peace, parents, mentors, divine intervention, forgiveness, tender mercies, teachers, dear friends, kind leaders, mild detractors, hope, talents, experiences, teaching trials, meaningful heartaches, strengthening opposition, loving encouragement, and light! How can I feel anything but grateful?